wide awake

"1, 2, 3 [snap fingers], WIDE AWAKE"
suddenly we are all alert in our folding chairs
audience chuckling at our various states of hypnosis
eating their corn dogs and telling their kids to sit still a little longer

he has trained us to be dolly partons, roosters crowing,
elvis and in love with the person next to us
there is a ringer
he is the shoe-stealer
stuffs all of our shoes in his clothing
as the audience howls with laughter
but i know he's a fake because i saw him do it before

and what about the rest of us?
are we so eager for a laugh that we will pretend we are under this spell?
so eager that even in my bed
at 5 am
i am suddenly wide awake
and doing as i was told

churning my emotions like butter and
looking for any old soul to curl up next to
finding no one and no laughs to encourage much effort

i'd rather be like the magician than the hypnotist
pulling fanciful items out of my top hat
i'd choose a rabbit over everything else, though
soft, easy, innocent
nuzzles me like a scared child
doesn't know any better
trusts me like i am home
rather than the great manipulator of its life

wide awake
at 5am
i do as i was told
i am the damn bunny
and i just want to crawl back into that top hat
and i just want to get off this stage